Whoops I Almost Forgot! - #15

Just remembered that I promised to report what my focus was for December but didn't follow through!

My priority for December was to exercise. I did pretty well except for yesterday (Saturday) when I couldn't make myself do anything. But I was back at it today for thirty minutes even though it was my day off.

My overall priority for 2018 is exercise. My intention is to do some exercise or movement six days a week and take Sunday off. I will keep you posted.  

I'm taking the word priority at its most basic meaning - as singular. I, of course, will have other priorities but want to declare exercise as my #1 priority.

I would love to hear what your #1 priority will be for the new year. 

Thanks for exploring the mystery - Nicky Mendenhall

Is Insight By Its Nature Paradoxical? - #14

For as long as I can remember, wanderlust was a reason for living and the reason I saved money. Because of a health scare early this year, we didn't venture out into the world in 2017. My desire to travel evaporated and my partner followed suit. All we could see were the obstacles: tiny airplane seats, crowds, long waits in line, hassles.

As the new year approaches there are questions bubbling in my brain. Will my yearning return? If not, what will replace what I gained in foreign lands?  

A source of insight for me is the Rabindranath Tagore Reader which has been residing in the main bathroom since September 2016. Recently I underlined Tagore's response to a woman friend who wrote him describing  her travels: 

"You move yourself, but I remain stationary while everything before me moves."

Perhaps this sentence grabbed my attention because Tagore was expressing what I've been feeling. Not much feels the same to me even though I haven't traveled.

Or maybe Tagore is speaking of paradox like we did last week?

Has something you always thought you wanted lost its appeal? Did you ever gain it back? Can you share an example of a paradoxical situation? Do you think that life has paradox at its core? Would you rather stay home? 

Thanks for exploring the mystery of paradox & life with me!
Nicky Mendenhall

*Image is me in Hong Kong a few years ago satisfying my desire to return to the bustling city after a fabulous visit in 1994.

A Taxidermy Break! - #13

I am giddy with joy at having a live fragrant tree in our house. With darkness coming so early the colored lights, our only decoration, satisfy my need for light. I'm not feeling the frenzy of the season quite as much this year because my gratitude for being mobile and healthy crowds out petty worries.

I do want to think of nonseasonal things occasionally so I figure maybe you would too. As they say on Monty Python, "And now for something completely different":

The paradox of taxidermy is that it both reanimates and stills.

I can't stop thinking about the idea that something can do two seemingly opposing things - animate and still. I'd like to give credit  but all  I have in front of me is a two inch piece of ripped newsprint. I didn't know my mind would continue to masticate on this idea or I would have saved more of the article.

Of course my question is, what else has this paradoxical nature?  

Here's what I've come up with: 

Let's say your priority is to be good and your fantasy is that if you are good enough, (the proverbial good girl), your life will be pert near perfect. If things are going well for the good girl, she will feel animated.

Being the good girl can also put a damper on (still) her creative life. Following all the rules and keeping everyone happy would have the effect of "stilling" her.

Do you identify with the good girl? I must admit I do.

Can you think of something else that does two things at once while seeming opposite? My mind and me would really appreciate your ideas!

Thanks for exploring the mystery and merry paradoxes to you!
                                Nicky Mendenhall

Strange Bedfellows: Priorities & Obstacles - #12

Establishing a Morning Routine, the class I'm enrolled in, takes place on Zoom. Postage-stamp-sized videos of attendees in rows inadvertently provide entertainment. It's difficult not to track participants as they jump up and down from their chairs, cats as they stroll leisurely across keyboards, or a cockatoo hopping around her owner's shoulders.  

Also entertaining, and difficult not to watch, is watching myself. I remember Nolan's comment that he has better posture after viewing himself on home security video and I understand more what he is talking about.

Last week I mentioned that thinking of the word priority as singular was a help. Here's what I'm thinking:

If this class is truly a priority, I would sign on while sitting in a room by myself. This would mean I could "raise my hand," be unmuted, and interact with Susan as if I was in the same room with her. I did this during class #one. Conversing in real time with a person I consider my teacher felt like an honor. The class seemed more vital and alive. 

I treated the second and third classes as one of several priorities. Yes, class was important and a priority but I also had other priorities: sitting in the living room (with earphones) basking in the Christmas tree lights, feeling in-sync to my reading-a-book partner and being careful to not disturb the peaceful atmosphere were all priorities for me.

Ironically, Susan focused on obstacles in the third class. The first obstacle, laziness, had three components. 

The first component was said to be ordinary. I can understand ordinary laziness - things like not moving out of my bed or chair. Experts say sitting is the new smoking. I struggle daily to have enough movement in my routine. I love to sit and read or sit and write.

The second component was described as being disheartened. It could also be described as a loss of faith.  I feel disheartened about our country and the deep divisions between us, not to mention my disappointment that we don't have a woman president.

The third way to be lazy is by being too busy. This is when we don't remember what is important. This gets us back to priorities.  

In this busy season it may be more important than ever to set a priority or determine what priorities we want to work toward.

Next post I will list my priority for December. Will you tell me what your priority for the rest of December will be?  Short one word answers and longer reflections welcomed. This question is not easy so don't be surprised if it takes you awhile to answer.

Also stay tuned for the paradox of taxidermy!

Thank you for making reading exploring the mystery a priority and not letting obstacles get in the way.   Nicky Mendenhall

What Constitutes A Crazy Comment? - #11

By the time you receive this, two of the four classes on establishing a morning routine will be over. As there weren't any comments last week, I can only assume you are too busy paying attention to what actually occurs when you get out of bed.  

I spoke to a friend who commented she didn't comment because she felt any comment she made about her morning routine of petting, feeding, and loving her kitten would appear crazy to others. I said I didn't think so. What do the rest of you think?

One reason for participating in a morning routine class is my list of what I want to accomplish in the morning is long. It often feels overwhelming.  I want to write, meditate, walk, exercise, read my emails, read the paper, prepare and eat breakfast. Each item begs to be first! 


One might say I should pick a priority. In a funny sort of way, hearing that the word priority is singular helped me deal with this problem. I'll explain more next week. 

What do you do first in the morning? What do you want to do?

Looking forward to your input &
Thanks for exploring the mystery - Nicky Mendenhall

What Grabs Your Attention In The Morning? - #10

Susan Piver, meditation teacher, writer, and creator of the Open Heart Project, offered an online class to OHP members on how to establish a morning routine. I signed up. 

The first class was Tuesday.  Two of her ideas interest me and I'm thinking about them and want to see what you think:

1. A morning routine is a way to check in with yourself. 

2. The days you follow through with the morning routine you design will be more satisfying than the days when you don't.

The class is for four weeks so I will be paying attention to these ideas. I would love to hear any thoughts you have on these two ideas or any other ideas on attention. I will be sharing what comes up for me during this process.

Thanks for exploring the mystery - Nicky Mendenhall