During my junior year of high school, my career goal was to become a missionary in Africa. Knowing what I know now, I would wager my religious fervor was less about saving souls and more about escaping Iowa. Mom said my weak constitution made it too risky to travel to Africa
Sixteen years later my wanderlust was reignited when offered the opportunity to see eight countries in eleven days. To accept this once-in-a-lifetime trip meant leaving my month-old newborn with his grandparents. At risk was attachment to my new son. This time Mom said go see the world; she & Dad would keep both my children.
During the next thirty-five years, travel was a vital part of my life.
Now, when home for a period of time, my comfortable routine is becoming harder and harder to leave.
My growing attachment is to being comfortable. This is a new attachment and it is not one that feels well - entirely comfortable!
The purpose of life is not just to be comfortable - is it?
Tell me your thoughts about your cocoon if you have one. How do you roust yourself out of it to go have adventures? Are you attached to being comfortable?
Email me or go to the comments section. I really need to hear from you!
*Webster's online New World College Dictionary.
Photo received at the Greater Des Moines Botanical Garden,
May 9, 2015.
This reminded me of thinking Mom and Dad were pretty good about traveling throughout their lives, and I admired them for that. I suppose the last few years of Mom's life involved less, but Dad resumed going places after her death. It can be challenging to think of being in strange places, especially considering personal space(and bathroom issues). Your whole routine is disrupted. But, after I go, I'm always glad I went and think I appreciate home more. Whatever I do, stay home or go away, staying in that "mode" is always easier for me. The challenge for me is just change! Maybe that's the way it is for most people, although I suppose some people like to travel more than others.
ReplyDeleteThat is such a good point - it is the disruption of whatever we are doing that is difficult.
DeleteThanks for your thoughtful comment!
The purpose of life is to find joy and if staying at home being comfortable brings you joy, do it! Seriously, I believe that God/Goddess/Universal Spirit/One Mind (whatever you want to call it) created us to enjoy and experience life with abundance, fulfillment, love and happiness.
ReplyDeleteI remember your first trip to India. Mom and I both were worried that you would fall seriously ill in that country or endanger your health in someway. I don’t think I ever thought of you with a “weak constitution”….you were my big sister…..until Mom talked about it. It’s amazing what effect our words can have. That’s why we need to be so careful in how we use them, both internally and expressed externally.
I like your statement of purpose!
DeleteYes, words are powerful and I think some of Mom's words limited me for many years but others helped me. I especially like your thought of being careful of our internal words!
Thanks for reading and responding!
I think it was the early 1970s when cocooning was the "newest" thing. It was fashionable to stay home and invite others to your home.
ReplyDeleteI guess everything cycles. Reminds me of going from bell bottoms to skinny jeans and from thin to wide lapels and ties.
Right now the default seems to be that you have to get out there. If happiness lies within yourself, do you need to constantly experience new things? And must it be the same for everyone?
Thanks for the larger view! We are affected by the social culture and I hadn't thought of that aspect. I like all of your questions and have had most of them myself. I don't think it has to be the same for everyone - I'm pretty clear about that one but the others we will have to talk about!
DeleteI appreciate your reading and responding!
I read your post on "exploring the mystery." I am feeling like you -- staying home in my cocoon seems more comfortable -- perhaps even more fun -- than travel.
ReplyDeleteThinking about it takes me in a circle -- I know I'm comfortable at home, so it would take something really appealing to draw me away from that, but if it is appealing, do I know it actually will be more fun than staying home? What if it isn't? What if I assume it won't be and i don't even try? How will I know if I don't try? But trying would take me out of my comfortable little nest at home.
It would take something really appealing to draw me away from that.
So obviously I've not reached any conclusions or even leanings. Round and round i go.
The round and round business can occasionally lead us to new insights. This is my hope for you! Please let me know what you discern as you explore your questions.
DeleteThanks for your interesting comment!
Hi Nicky,
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure this would be helpful to post on your blog, but I think some cocooning involves personality type. I am an introvert, even though I can be quite sociable and do well in crowds. For a bit of time, I was an event planner at Meredith! But what I like best is to be by myself in my own house. I love my home, and I am never lonely or wishing I was out and about. I think I could stay inside my house for an entire week and not feel like I need to get out!
To get myself out of this, I remind myself that when I'm out at local events, or traveling, etc. I really do enjoy it so much. Seeing the different sites, experiencing different cultures and foods, etc. There's so much out there, that I hate to miss it.
So there is the struggle: to find the right balance. So I give myself the "when I look back" test. After the event, trip, etc. would be over and I did not go, would I look back and say...dang! I wish I would have gone, done that, seen the show....
We are planning a trip next week to the Willamette Valley area in Oregon, and sometimes I think: it would be so much easier to stay home and read and stay in my routine. But I know that when I get out there it will be amazing (been there before and love it), and I will love every minute of it and will love remembering the experience. So off we will go and I know I would have been disappointed to miss it.
For what it's worth.... :)
Connie
Connie - I like your insight about personality type influencing our choices.
DeleteHave a great trip!
As we age, I think we--or at least I--are more and more drawn to familiarity and comfort. But, I agree, the purpose of life is not to just be comfortable. I push myself with tutoring the immigrants, saying yes to things like taking care of Aadi--driving!--in California, trying new classes at the Y, being open about Circle. I think frequent consideration of the challenge/comfort thing is wise. Cuba anyone?
ReplyDeleteQuote from Vicki's Emily: "A caterpillar goes into a raccoon and comes out a beautiful butterfly."
Thanks for your thoughtful comment Karen. You're doing a lot to explore your "uncomfortable" zone and I know it hasn't always been easy but you keep going! I admire that!
DeleteThanks also for Emily's comment - how earnest she sounds!