Tolerating Physical Symptoms

I'm still reading The Body Keeps The Score by Bessel Van Der Kolk, M.D. It has been a helpful resource for our series on attachment. Bessel also offers advice on managing pain.

I'm paying attention to that part right now. 

The tradition at my church Easter Sunday is for the minister to invite members of the congregation, who so desire, to walk down front and sing the Alleluia Chorus with the esteemed Chancel Choir.  

I'm a soprano and to my surprise, some of the alleluias were higher this year. Hold your mouth open as if you are going to sing alleluia. See how it stretches your jaw? I wasn't able to hit the highest notes but I had to look like I was hitting the highest notes. My mouth was stretched wide open even when no sound was coming out.  

After church, Easter dinner. To chew ham was difficult enough but forcing a malted-milk-ball-Easter-egg into my mouth was even more difficult. The second egg harder than the first!

I began to recognize TMJ symptoms.

In order to cope, I'm using Bessel's advice to manage pain. He calls pain, a sensation. 

If Bessel were here he would say: "Nicky - you need to tolerate your physical sensations for what they are - just sensations in the present, with a beginning, a middle, and an end."

He would help me stay calm enough to notice what I felt without judgment. Without catastrophizing. Without beating myself up for not feeling 100%. 

Next time you have a physical symptom, hear Bessel's voice (or mine) encouraging you to tolerate your physical sensation for what it is - just a sensation in the present, with a beginning, a middle, and an end.

Right now it is Tuesday morning. I woke up with my jaw sensations and a new one: the sensation that I didn't publish this last night. This was affirmed when it didn't come into my inbox this morning. I don't know when Feedburner will send this out.

Whenever you receive this, send me and my jaw healing energy. 

Thanks for exploring the mystery of sensations - Nicky Mendenhall