Lewis Richmond,* the author of Aging as a Spiritual Practice: A Contemplative Guide to Growing Older and Wiser, proposes we consider two kinds of time: horizontal time and vertical time.
Living is a little like driving on a long desert highway with each day, month, and year signified by a road sign. When we look back on the road we just traveled (left), we see the past with all its joys and sorrows. When we look ahead on the road (right), we imagine what is to come. He labels this kind of time, horizontal time.
Vertical time, according to Richmond, refers to the present moment. While horizontal time is primarily mental, vertical time is physical and in the body. Vertical time has no before and no after.
If you want a taste of these two kinds of time try this: Picture your breath going in and out your ears.** Imagine your breath on the exhale going to the left while you think about important events in your past and continue to think of the past while you inhale. Do this three times. Pay attention to which events make themselves known to you - they may be different each time you practice this. Repeat the process picturing your breathing going to the right as you picture future events. Repeat three times. You have been experiencing horizontal time.
Now sit up straight and imagine the breath going straight up and down your spine. Let the breath pool in your belly before you exhale - pay attention to the whole process of breathing. You may choose to hold the breath for a moment before you exhale. Breathing in and breathing out. Up and down. This happens in the present moment.
Breathing vertically will likely bring a sense of spaciousness. It slows breathing down. There is no dashing back and forth between past and future.
Richmond concludes: "When we include vertical time -- the timeless conviction of the present moment -- we can find relief from the signposts on horizontal time's highway."
Let me know how this works for you.
*Permission graciously given by Lewis Richmond personal correspondence, 5/21/2012.
**The author of exploring the mystery is responsible for suggesting ear breathing.
Thanks again for exploring the mystery - Nicky Mendenhall
If you wish to read this post on the web click here: www.NickyMendenhall.blogspot.com
Friday, May 25, 2012
Friday, May 18, 2012
Desiring and Wanting - #21
Contemplating the word desire and contemplating the word want this week increased my appreciation for both words.
The word desire ushered in my internal landscape where ideas and values ripe with meaning dwell. My desire to be in the present moment was front and center.
One aspect of being in the here and now, that we can easily overlook, is the necessity of identifying and staying with feelings no matter how elusive or disturbing they are.
It is a different matter when the focus moves from our internal landscape to the external world. When this occurs, the word want may be more appropriate. For example, I wanted an art table. For me, want is reserved for something concrete.
Whether we are under the influence of desire or want, benefits will accrue if we locate and explore the feelings that underlie our yearning. In our culture feelings are perceived as bothersome or untrustworthy; we are often encouraged to ignore or medicate them.
Feelings are messengers that make our desires and wants known to us. There is wisdom in the phrase, "don't shoot the messenger."
Feelings are not trustworthy until they are examined closely. As we tend to our feelings they shift and change. That is the nature of the beast. It behoves us to pay attention to feelings for they come from the oldest part of the brain. There are reasons why they persist. Ignore them at your peril.
Feelings are mysterious and haven't found an honorable place in the twenty-first century. You can be on the cutting edge of evolution if you are open to exploring the mystery!
Nicky Mendenhall
To read post on blog: www.nickymendenhall.blogspot.com
The word desire ushered in my internal landscape where ideas and values ripe with meaning dwell. My desire to be in the present moment was front and center.
One aspect of being in the here and now, that we can easily overlook, is the necessity of identifying and staying with feelings no matter how elusive or disturbing they are.
It is a different matter when the focus moves from our internal landscape to the external world. When this occurs, the word want may be more appropriate. For example, I wanted an art table. For me, want is reserved for something concrete.
Whether we are under the influence of desire or want, benefits will accrue if we locate and explore the feelings that underlie our yearning. In our culture feelings are perceived as bothersome or untrustworthy; we are often encouraged to ignore or medicate them.
Feelings are messengers that make our desires and wants known to us. There is wisdom in the phrase, "don't shoot the messenger."
Feelings are not trustworthy until they are examined closely. As we tend to our feelings they shift and change. That is the nature of the beast. It behoves us to pay attention to feelings for they come from the oldest part of the brain. There are reasons why they persist. Ignore them at your peril.
Feelings are mysterious and haven't found an honorable place in the twenty-first century. You can be on the cutting edge of evolution if you are open to exploring the mystery!
Nicky Mendenhall
To read post on blog: www.nickymendenhall.blogspot.com
Friday, May 11, 2012
A LIFE DRIVEN BY DESIRE - #20
Did the title of today's post grab your attention?
This was the headline for a review of Theodore Dreiser's, The Financier and it captured my attention. According to the WSJ (5-5-2012), desire was Mr. Dreiser's lifelong fascination. Dreiser wove the theme of what people want, what keeps them wanting and how their social situations shape what they want throughout his body of work.
Today Dreiser might pay to consult a "wantologist." An article in NY Times Sunday Review entitled, The Outsourced Life, showed how far the market has penetrated our private lives by promoting certified wantologists; professionals trained to help us know what we want.
In both of these articles, writers used the words want and desire interchangeably. The first definition in the New Oxford American Dictionary for want is "have a desire to possess." First definition for desire in the same dictionary is "a strong feeling of wanting to have something."
Stephen Schettini* says that being in the present moment is a matter of paying attention. What happens when we pay attention to the words desire and want? Let's pay attention to which words open more possibilities for us in our interior landscape. What happens when you think about what you want? Is that easier than using the word desire?
The Desert Fathers and Mothers** remind us that one cannot expect desires to be achieved immediately. In a similar fashion, it takes time to learn how to focus our attention. If our first efforts at meeting our desires and focusing our attention are not successful, it is prudent not to give up but to keep practicing. Learning a new skill takes time and effort.
My desire to be in the present moment and my want to be in the present moment continues. I'm still thinking about the different connotations each word has for me.
Let me know what you think. I desire and want to know.
*www.TheNakedMonk.com
**In the Heart of the Desert (2008) by John Chryssavgis.
Thanks for exploring the mystery - Nicky Mendenhall
This was the headline for a review of Theodore Dreiser's, The Financier and it captured my attention. According to the WSJ (5-5-2012), desire was Mr. Dreiser's lifelong fascination. Dreiser wove the theme of what people want, what keeps them wanting and how their social situations shape what they want throughout his body of work.
Today Dreiser might pay to consult a "wantologist." An article in NY Times Sunday Review entitled, The Outsourced Life, showed how far the market has penetrated our private lives by promoting certified wantologists; professionals trained to help us know what we want.
In both of these articles, writers used the words want and desire interchangeably. The first definition in the New Oxford American Dictionary for want is "have a desire to possess." First definition for desire in the same dictionary is "a strong feeling of wanting to have something."
Stephen Schettini* says that being in the present moment is a matter of paying attention. What happens when we pay attention to the words desire and want? Let's pay attention to which words open more possibilities for us in our interior landscape. What happens when you think about what you want? Is that easier than using the word desire?
The Desert Fathers and Mothers** remind us that one cannot expect desires to be achieved immediately. In a similar fashion, it takes time to learn how to focus our attention. If our first efforts at meeting our desires and focusing our attention are not successful, it is prudent not to give up but to keep practicing. Learning a new skill takes time and effort.
My desire to be in the present moment and my want to be in the present moment continues. I'm still thinking about the different connotations each word has for me.
Let me know what you think. I desire and want to know.
*www.TheNakedMonk.com
**In the Heart of the Desert (2008) by John Chryssavgis.
Thanks for exploring the mystery - Nicky Mendenhall
Friday, May 4, 2012
Desires revisited - #19
Many of us sit on our desires until they are dead. An expired desire is comparable to a dead car battery. It needs a jump-start in order to spring into action.
Desires go dormant long before they die in order to protect themselves from the internal haranguing inflicted by outdated negative voices.
Example: Whenever you want to spend money on a project that will make you happy, an inner voice shames you by saying that you don't have enough money. This is an old part/voice that doesn't know you have a good job plus a savings account and can afford to spend money on your desires. The part is back in the old days when there wasn't a penny for happiness and it isn't aware of the rewards you will reap when discover and meet your desires.
Jump-Start: Realize and name the different parts you have inside you. Each comes from an inner personality that Richard C. Schwartz* calls a part. Be curious about each part. Get to know the concerns they express. Use facts to calm the part down when needed.
Be a detective and investigate the parts of your inner landscape.
Getting our desires met makes us feel happy and satisfied. People like to be around people who feel this way.
Most of the time others will cheer you on. If they don't, there may be a couple of reasons: these are not people who love you or they are people who love you.**
So go ahead - listen to your desires and work towards fulfilling them. Everybody wins!
*Introduction to the Internal Family Systems Model, 2001, Richard C. Schwartz, Ph.D.
**If you begin doing something for yourself after a lifetime of listening to inner voices that emphasize serving and putting others first, there may be a time when the people affected by your changes will give you "change-back" messages. Change-back messages are the stuff of your worst nightmares. Accusations like, "You used to be so nice," or "You are making too many changes - you are not responsible anymore." If you can maintain your new position with a kind patience, they will adjust and eventually be happy in the new arrangement. The reason people respond with change back messages is because if you are different, they won't be able to relate to you in the same old way which means they have to change. You may be stirring up some of their own baggage or fears. It may take them time to get used to the new you but they will eventually support your new efforts if they have a healthy love for you.
Thanks for exploring the mystery - Nicky Mendenhall
Desires go dormant long before they die in order to protect themselves from the internal haranguing inflicted by outdated negative voices.
Example: Whenever you want to spend money on a project that will make you happy, an inner voice shames you by saying that you don't have enough money. This is an old part/voice that doesn't know you have a good job plus a savings account and can afford to spend money on your desires. The part is back in the old days when there wasn't a penny for happiness and it isn't aware of the rewards you will reap when discover and meet your desires.
Jump-Start: Realize and name the different parts you have inside you. Each comes from an inner personality that Richard C. Schwartz* calls a part. Be curious about each part. Get to know the concerns they express. Use facts to calm the part down when needed.
Be a detective and investigate the parts of your inner landscape.
Getting our desires met makes us feel happy and satisfied. People like to be around people who feel this way.
Most of the time others will cheer you on. If they don't, there may be a couple of reasons: these are not people who love you or they are people who love you.**
So go ahead - listen to your desires and work towards fulfilling them. Everybody wins!
*Introduction to the Internal Family Systems Model, 2001, Richard C. Schwartz, Ph.D.
**If you begin doing something for yourself after a lifetime of listening to inner voices that emphasize serving and putting others first, there may be a time when the people affected by your changes will give you "change-back" messages. Change-back messages are the stuff of your worst nightmares. Accusations like, "You used to be so nice," or "You are making too many changes - you are not responsible anymore." If you can maintain your new position with a kind patience, they will adjust and eventually be happy in the new arrangement. The reason people respond with change back messages is because if you are different, they won't be able to relate to you in the same old way which means they have to change. You may be stirring up some of their own baggage or fears. It may take them time to get used to the new you but they will eventually support your new efforts if they have a healthy love for you.
Thanks for exploring the mystery - Nicky Mendenhall
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